Private versus public spaces
I've thought a lot about the private and public spaces that I occupy recently.
Privacy sits on a spectrum, and it's up to us to decide how we want to approach it. There are no "right" or "wrong" answers here. It depends in part on where you are in life, but your personality and personal values also play an important role.
Personal growth in public
When I was in my early 20s, I lived in public. I started my personal blog and wrote about my overseas travels and all the things I was learning. Sharing things in public benefited me. I made friends, got a few awesome opportunities, and learned valuable skills.
Public spaces are good for things like accountability, support, and sometimes motivation. So, personal growth in public can be quite impactful. Until it isn't.
Unfortunately, public spaces can also be a breeding ground for abuse. Especially online where we can hide behind the screen. People say some nasty things to each other on the internet: Hello anonymous trolls! Psychologists call this moral disengagement, which explains, to some extent, why hate speech and cyberbullying permeate online spaces.
Personal growth in private
I've kept a journal since I was a teenager, and I think that's been healthy for me. I need a space to think for myself, without anyone chipping in with their opinions or advice. To figure out my own internal benchmarks for success and develop an inner scorecard.
In my late 20s, I started valuing deeper 1-1 connections. This newsletter is a result of that transition. For the past two years I've sent out a weekly newsletter. I enjoy the conversations I have with my readers. We can talk about more private stuff, without worrying over likes or trolls.
Being extremely private is at the other end of the spectrum. You decide to get off the grid completely by cutting all ties with Big Tech. Say goodbye to that beloved smartphone. You pay a price for your privacy, missing out on all those cute dog videos, not to mention the FOMO you'll experience.
Over to you
Both public and private places have their role to play in our personal growth. Have you thought about this division and reflected on where you sit on this spectrum?
Is it time to put yourself "out there" or is it better to turn inward and figure out what matters most to you?
I'm interested in hearing your thoughts on this subject. Or if you have any questions or comments. Just hit reply or shout me an email to: olle@ollelindholm.com
Let's keep the conversation going, in private ;)
Have a great week!
Cheers,
Olle
Olle Lindholm
A Sweden-based author and coach.
Olle Lindholm Average people lead average lives. You, I’m guessing, don’t want to be average. You want to be great, you believe you can be remarkable. That means you need to take in extraordinary ideas and act on them… without even thinking about it… day in and day out. Read these 15 personal growth books and you’ll become an unstoppable life enthusiast. You’ll become a master. See, every decision you make, every person you let into your life, every moment that goes by… begins and ends with...
I watched the finale of Champion of Champions. The TV show follows top Swedish athletes who have won gold in their respective fields. But physical strength, technique, and stamina were only one part of their success. An oft-overlooked part of the equation was the mental training required to win... and to keep going. What set them apart was their champion mindset. But what, exactly, does that mean? They compete against themselves The champions defined what winning meant to them. They taught...
Take a moment to think about your habits. Why do you act the way you do? Psychology offers three explanations: Learning by association (classical conditioning): Some things we don't need to learn. They're "hard-wired" into our system from birth; we pair a stimulus (e.g. a loud noise) with a response (fear). This learning is often unconscious and happens quickly. Check out Pavlov's dogs if you're curious to learn more. Learning by consequences (reinforcements/punishments): Some things we learn...